(continued...)    and one night a metamorphosis occurred within me.

I now know that what happened was caused by my conscious evaluation of myself and that I wanted to change so deeply, I wanted change the way a drowning man wants fresh air. I yearned to be different than I was.


I wanted to be softer, kinder, more loving and since that time I have practised Love and sharing that Love with all who crossed my path to the best of my ability.

I became clairvoyant, seeing colours everywhere and upon concentrating on one particular colour at a time I began to see human forms within the colours and telepathically these Beings began speaking to me and teaching me about the nature of man and life and death.

I began to cultivate a real need for God and so began the religious part of my journey, reading the bible, attending church and later serving those same churches until one day that part of my learning was over and I knew the difference between religion and spirituality.

I was so excited about all of this and literally walked on air. I became a teacher and healer, running workshops and giving healings along the way.

And then I met what you might term my soul mate, a soul who I had loved in a previous life but the love that we shared was never fulfilled during that incarnation.

For the ensuing 17 years that we spent together in this lifetime my soul felt as though it was turned upside down and inside out and I can honestly say it was the worst of times for me and yet it was the best of times.

I learned about the dark side of man's nature (used loosely to mean men and women here), I learned about deceit, secretiveness, violence and despair and control, until the time came when I realised that I was dying and that I was living in the wrong vibration, that I wasn't living my life at all.

By this time I had moved to Cyprus with my husband (soul mate) and we had a thriving business there and a beautiful stunning home with the Mediterranean sea in front of us and the mountains behind. But death was all around me, my soul was dying.

So I left everything, literally, and at the age of 56 I walked away from it all on 28th April 2009 with just a suitcase and came back to England and slept on my mother's sofa. You see, even though I was dying I had such faith in Life/God and I knew that I had been removed from what I now call Ye Olde 3D Worlde.

I found myself being totally and completely taken care of in every way imaginable.

My sister and her husband bought a beautiful apartment as an investment and said 'Here this is for you for as long a you need it', a car was given to me by an old friend of my brother's and my rainbow apartment, as I like to call it, is full of colour and so uncomplicated.

WOW is all I could say.

Since then I have lived a simple life completely out of the corporate world and my soul has been rebuilding me literally, quietly and magnificently.

I have needed to be isolated, to be away from the ways of the people of Ye Olde 3D Worlde which literally makes me feel sick most of the time. I think I have learned to be in the world but not of it.

And now, today, my heart's desire is to Be Love and teach from Love. I do not want to save the people who live in the olde worlde I want to help give birth to the New World that is upon us.

When I first awakened all those years ago God said to me 'Comfort My People', and those words and the feeling that accompanied them brought me to tears and as I write them now they bring me to tears.

Many, many people are in turmoil and need direction, love and comforting. So so many are so full of anger and rage and underneath it all is a deep deep sadness that requires attention and awareness.

At the moment I liken the phase that I am in as similar to the journey of  a caterpillar that has already turned to mush and my transformation into a butterfly is imminent.

I am discovering that a lot of what I knew is old consciousness and belongs in Ye Olde 3D Worlde. That I am moving away from anything complicated.

I realise that God/Life is really uncomplicated and that what I used to teach in my workshops 10 years ago is now mostly defunct, although it was valuable at the time.

Now, I just want to be Love and teach from Love.

I hold so much sadness around the state of the peoples of the world and I realise that I must let go of sadness too, for sadness is not the natural state of God and my being.

I am so relieved and grateful that I no longer have to balance my chakras for I come from the one big Heart Chakra which balances all (uncomplicated eh!).

I realise that I don’t have to hold in my mind anything for all will be given as and when appropriate, for if I hold information in my mind and try to teach from there I am in duality and therefore am susceptible to complication which leads to chaos and deceit.

I am so relieved that I no longer have to chant mantras and recite affirmations for I AM the affirmation that I chanted.

I am restructuring at my core, in my DNA, I can feel it. Actually I am not restructuring, so much is falling away from me that I feel almost new, so in truth I Am Letting Go.

I Just Let Go. I didn’t promise to Let Go, I didn’t journal about it, I made no public announcement, I didn’t do a 5 step Spiritual Mind Treatment, I didn’t call the prayer line, in fact I didn’t utter a word, I JUST LET GO. Like a leaf falling from the tree, I let go.

So this is who I am being. My heart's desire. Love.

This is my soul’s mission to be Love and spread Love and that is closely followed by Freedom.

I am Love, I am Freedom and so it then follows that I desire to teach and share all that I am uncovering from within me.

I am being expanded knowing and I realise that Humanity is rising as a species.  I am Awake and must wake others so that they can choose consciously.

I am a Signpost.

I am going out into the world and I am going to comfort God’s people anyway I can.

I am eternal. We are eternal.

From my warm heart to all of you.


Rivenhall March 2011



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